Kids are asleep, house is a mess, dishes are still in the sink and here I am dying to get my first blog post EVER typed and up for the world (who doesn’t know us, or know we have a blog) to read.

My personality wants to sit down to post ONLY when my house is tidy, floors are vacuumed, music is playing and I have a hot cup of coffee in my hand. My personality, or more my flesh, would also like to sit down and post AS IF I have this whole parenting and marriage thing figured out. Kids bathed, brushed, read to and in their pajamas, however, that wasn’t the case tonight. Truth be told, my older two both had melt downs at the dinner table AND as they were going to bed, one child is wearing only pants and the other only a shirt, and I am pretty sure I tasted some dinner when I kissed my youngest good night. So there you have it. I am learning that, instead of guilt, this leads me to thankfulness. Thankfulness that God still uses me as a mom and wife even on my rough days, messy days, and my still-in-sweats days. As Jennifer Kennedy Dean puts it in her book, altar’d, all I need to do is “be present to His Presence.”

“knowing how close Jesus is–in all His power and His readiness to step in and take over every burden or situation–will change the way you live the minutes of your days.” –altar’d

Learning to practice the presence of Jesus in my home, even on the messy days, is one of the most powerful things I can do as a wife and as a mom. This keeps me centered and connected to my source of power. I often forget to do this, so yesterday I made a list of all the mundane things I do as a mom, and attached a deeper meaning to each of those chores. I am setting a goal to practice the presence of Jesus this week as I do them. Here are a few examples:

1. It is not just folding laundry, but a chance to pray for my family by name as i fold their clothes.

2. It is not just bathing my kids, but an opportunity to speak out blessings over their lives.

3. It is not just discipline, but training my kids to respond to Jesus’ voice and obey Him.

4. It is not just picking up toys, but having a thankful heart for the abundant blessings in our lives, and also to train my kids in gratitude.

My days, even the roughest of them, are not about whether or not I am still in sweats, the beds are made, or whether or not I let my kids watch a cartoon, BUT whether or not I pushed into Jesus and stayed connected to His source of power in my parenting. I often think of a description my oldest sister used of a branch flopping around on a sidewalk trying, TRYING to produce fruit. We all know how silly this picture is, because there is NO WAY it will produce fruit on its own. Am I that way, trying in so many different ways to produce, or look like I’m producing, fruit in my kids’ or even my own life? Friends (can I call you that?), let me remind you how silly that picture is, for we CANNOT do it without being connected to our source of power.

So as I click “publish,” and get up and tidy my home (dancing because I just wrote my first blog), kiss my babies and lay my head on my pillow, I will pray over my family and ask forgiveness for the moments I attempted to parent alone. And tomorrow as I wake up (WAY too early) to chattering, hungry kids, I will hopefully do better than today at being present to His presence. Good night.

-Hanna